I was wondering what it would have been like if my aunt would’ve come out during my adolescence. I wonder what would have happened if I had more of a homosexual role model so to speak. She was sort of a I recluse and didn’t really speak of her sexuality at all but it was ever present. She was a sergeant in the army and then retired. Her mannerisms all directed you to the fact that she was a dyke. she dressed manly had two very long-term girlfriends but it was never addressed directly. Throughout my childhood I was wondering exactly what was going on. I really didn’t care one way or the other I just was confused. I guess she was too.
She was brought up in an era where you want supposed to be gay and it was not accepted at any level especially being a lesbian. There were no role models to speak of anybody who might be a lesbian wouldn’t have come out hell they don’t even come out now. The stigma attached to being gay is still ever present. A woman is considered in some “phase” if she gets a girlfriend. I’m not sure if queen Latifa ever came out but it’s almost a fact that she’s a lesbian. Ellen took the brunt of it when she finally decided to publicly come out but look at her now. She’s so much better for it. The best part is, it’s pretty much a non-point now. Because really, you don’t see people confessing to be hetero. For me, having these role models present makes the other side of my ordeal not such an ordeal. The thought of life after I come out is refreshing and motivating. If they can do it, why can’t I?
I also have several blogger role models that I’d like to thank. Thier stories are inspiring and keep me going through the quagmire that is my life. First there’s angryricky. He is so supportive and writes a great deal about his experiences in coming out along with a myriad of other stuff. His insight is perceptive and forthright. I appreciate his honesty and hope he keeps blogging for a long time. Then there is singlein2012 and rachelsemancipation. Both are strong women who have come to terms with their sexuality, leaving their husbands and completely changing their lives to fulfill who they truly are. I find solace in their stories even if they aren’t perfect endings, they are exceptional beginnings.
I know the road I’m on isn’t easy but at least I know I have some wonderful role models to look to for support. There are also people in my “real” life who are struggling with a similar situation and we share our thoughts. It’s a bit easier to walk this path knowing I have the strength in support. If you are in the same situation, know that you are not alone. Reach out