Who’s cheating who?

So for the last month or so my husband has been giving me a hard time about coming home late or talking to any one on the phone. He excessively asks who I’m texting or half jokingly tells me to say “hi”to my boyfriend. It used to be something of a joke but lately I feel he’s being more sincere in his prodding.
The strange thing is, I have been honest about meeting a potential “friend” yet he never says anything about women.
I’m tired of being treated like a cheater. I know I’m not entirely honest with him but I am not cheating on him, man or woman. I definitely don’t want another swinging dick in my face. He wants sex all the damn time, I couldn’t imagine keeping up with two separate men. Ugh.
I have been somewhat honest about meeting a gf, but I’m not gonna go there till something solid comes from it. He doesn’t like details. So once I meet someone I click with, I’ll update him on my progress. I have told him about meeting someone in particular who has potential and he seemed ok. I haven’t done anything with her yet so there’s no updating needed yet.
I think he’s just upset cause I’m not just throwing “it” at him. If he’s not getting it every other night, he acts as if I’m giving it to someone else. His flirting has been relegated to “hey, are we gonna have sex tonight?” Wow, really? Everything he does is assumptive. Rub your shoulders? Sure, that means I get something in turn right? Do the dishes? Sure! It’s foreplay, not something that grown ups should naturally take care of. Look honey, I’m helping clean the house, that means I deserve a good night of play, but if you do it, it’s just expected.
So I cook, clean and bust my ass at work so when I do get a chance to go out the last thing I want to hear is “tell your boyfriend I said hi.” Tell him yourself! Get off the couch and come see that I’m just getting the hell out of the house where I do everything for everyone but myself. He can be fine watching tv, but I want to live and hear people’s opinions and explore. You can’t do that on the couch or with a dick on your shoulder.

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  1. Is it possible we’re married to the same man and don’t know it? Because your husband sounds just like mine. Except mine is constantly asking if I’m texting my girlfriend, and refers to all of my female friends as my girlfriends. It gets so old, so fast. Just ignore him.

  2. I just envisioned him literally draping it over your shoulder and laughed. Thanks for that.

    • Sad thing is… It’s not just figuratively speaking.

      • Yikes. It’s not a stole, or a feather boa. It’s not like you’re going to think, there’s something touching me. Oh look, a penis. How delightful! A person in your situation is much more likely to think, there’s something touching me. Oh look, DEAR GOD WHAT IS THAT THING? GET IT OFF! GET IT OFF!

      • It’s definitely a slug! Thank you Ricky. My best friend and I joke about the dick on the shoulder because it’s so bizarre. Please don’t think that I feel beholden to him to do something with it, especially when he does that. He usually does it when he is not getting enough attention. (When I’m working on the computer or on the phone.)
        He doesn’t realize how degrading and disgusting that is. As if it were some great gift. I usually respond with a sarcastic remark or mean look. He thinks it’s funny.
        The sad thing is, I know that you teach people how to treat you, so where did I go wrong. When did I start letting this disrespect be ok?
        Aside from all that, don’t feel bad for laughing. It’s a rediculous situation that requires one to laugh. What else could you do, except swat it with a shoe?

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